As I watch the ball drop in New York on the TV.
I am so thankful for being me.
I remember when I was healthy as can be
Sleeping through the night, full of energy,
Then came the news, I felt like my life was in jeopardy.
Parkinson's disease, first relief of knowing it had a name and then shock.
All I want to do is scream
Please God it must be a dream
Later on my sorrows became anger.
I remember crying and asking God. Why me?
Don't you think I have suffered enough,
Remember, the severe asthma attacks, the neglect and abuse
I realized there was no excuse.
The drinking, the fires, the fighting throughout my childhood.
The upcoming country stars , drinking and playing their songs
While my mother sang, we hid like we didn't belong.
I grew up in a Jekyll and Hide family.
Full of secrets, and acting as if all was fine.
When my parents were good they were really good.
I learned to overcome the horrors of my childhood.
I have lost my bone in my lower jaw. after many surgeries,
my lower teeth were lost and a lower denture implant.
In my brain a blood clot burst in one of my arteries.
Causing a major stroke, paralyzing my left side you see
But through a year of hard work, I am back to 99% of me.
Then a major car accident, I died for a few seconds,
and the pain within to come back and live,
instead of being in heaven.
And now this, Why me?
Then I heard my mothers voice, saying why not you.
God knows you will not give in
Knowing that you will fight till the end.
You can give in and let PD take over,
Don't rely on the luck of a 4 leaf clover.
or you can do everything to take control.
I am a fighter and I will be whole
while fighting Parkinson's disease
I have dystonia of my calves and feet
Botox has been a big help to treat.
Each day, I wake up and thank God for letting me stay.
I wish that I could throw Parkinson's disease away.
But I am thankful for doing everything
to keep Parkinson's in it 's place
I know that I am slow, and can't run a race.
Exercise and positive thinking is the key,
so I don't give up on me.
Then I am hit with two more major blows,
I have hardening of the arteries in my entire brain,
no where else in my body.
I have severe osteoporosis in my pelvic, neck, hips and spine.
I want to say and believe that all will be fine.
I have had many things happen to me,
but I worked through them to feel as positive as could be.
I have overcome severe depression,
I know how to stop it in it's tracts
when it tries to come back.
I would like to run and take a trolley
to feel the wind blowing through my hair
I wish that I could erase the past and
act like I didn't have a care.
But then reality sets in.
I know how bad things can be,
but I also know how wonderful it can seem
I try to think positive and throw away the negative.
Even if it seems repetitive.
I will always live with love in my heart.
I will not give in until that day arrives and I must part.
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